I recently met Tom in Bangkok; he is a travel/guidebook and adventure writer based in Thailand (check out his guides to Cambodia and Angkor Wat out on excellent MOON Publishing), and also former guitarist of Bangkok garage punkers Pussy and the Learjets. In brief, the kind of person I consider a hero. Check more Learjets here:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQCRufJnPlM

Tom is also the author of Sacred Skin, a very interesting photo book on sak yant, Thailand’s sacred tattoos, and the first on the subject in English. Expect to see a review cum interview up here soon if I won’t be able to place the article elsewhere… meanwhile, I have started my trip and I am in India. All is in a state of blur at the moment as many things are boiling and will be coming up extremely soon… some very good things for this poor little Monkey!!

I said it before and I’ll say it again: the first time I traveled extensively in Southern Thailand in late 2008 I was badly impressed by the state of commercialization and flock of “Banana Pancake Trail” tourists ala “Tubing in the Vang Vieng” t-shirts. After I did my open water dive certification in backpacker heaven Koh Tao, although having visited less explored areas like Nakhon Pathom and Nakhon Si Thammarat, I decided I had had enough of the major islands of the Thailand Gulf. When I arrived in Penang for the first time, the change of atmosphere won me over for good, and touristy Thailand was quickly forgotten.

I went back to Bangkok in early December 2009, on my way to Yangon, Myanmar. A day and a half spent around Kao San Road became dull after three hours, but the temples, the Chao Praya River boats and Chinatown were always great to stroll, especially at sunset. I have a love-hate relationship with Bangkok, still remaining one of those cities I never miss so much, but I always enjoy when I pass trough.

I did not plan to go back to Thailand, let alone in those places I already know are stacked with foreign tourist of all sorts. The chance occasion was the visit of my friend Matteo and his girlfriend Carola, visiting Malaysia on their way to Bangladesh and India, and the graduation of my roommate Shararee. Being their first time in Southeast Asia, I thought giving them a look of Thailand just across the border would have been an enlightening experience. My desire was to explore some off the beaten track parts of the country, in order to get a more authentic glance to a country that has a lot to scratch under the surface. The proximity of Penang to the southern Thai border came handy, because it is in the remote southeastern provinces that I thought I could find some interesting differences. Pattani, Yala and Narathiwat provinces border with the eastern and more conservative and muslim Malaysian states of Perak and Kelantan. It is here that since 2001, recurrent bombings have made it the unsettling scenario of a separatist movement contributing to give Islam a bad name.  Part religious extremism, part fight against the harsh repression put forward by the Thai military (being the suppression of the Tak Bai demonstration of October 2004 the most cruel, with more than 80 people dead because of police action… suffocated in the heat of police trucks’ while being transported to an army camp in Pattani province), groups of rebels terrorize the areas with random bombings, shooting sprees and assaults which have targeted not only the military, but also thousands of civilians, including monks, kids and women.

After a bit of research, other travelers’ reports seemed to describe the area as quite safe to travel, and I decided to head exactly that way. The curiosity was high, although I clearly knew it would not have been a problem, as this report testifies. I’m in one piece and still standing.

We left Penang at 12 pm on a minivan departing from Komtar, 28RM for a four hour trip up to Alor Star, and then northeast to the border at Sadao. This border is the most trafficked between Thailand and Malaysia: easy, with bored officials who do not like to smile nor talk to you, and treat your passport like a piece of toilet paper. You get off the bus, clear Malaysian formalities, get up again, and get off a few minutes later at the Thai border. Same here, get your 15 days stamp, proceed through the gate and get the minivan on the other side. From here, you reach Hat Yay in a breeze.

I’ve been to Hat Yay before, but never actually bothered paying a closer visit and spend a night there. We headed straight to the Cathay Guesthouse, very close to the railway station, and pretty central. They have very big, clean rooms for 200 Baht, and serve a pretty good and cheap western breakfast in the morning… the place look a bit run down and the toilets are definitely not the ones you find all over Thailand. I had a particular insistent cockroach on the wall behind me during the whole stay, and man, even scoops of water didn’t persuade it from crawling back up each time, regaining its spot on that same wall. This said, to the contrary of the reports found in Wikitravel, the beds are immaculate and the linens smell clean, and I would recommend it to anyone passing through Hat Yay.

We visited a few temples before setting back for the night markets area, where I had some delicious friend chicken with rice for 40 Bath. Definitely cheap. Hat Yay looks rugged and run down in parts, but has a good vibe… the night market is pretty bustling, and locals are friendly and curious. It is also famed for its prostitution and cheap shopping bargains attracting Malaysians and other locals, so I had to give a peek. We decided for the Pink Lady, a big complex with a lounge bar at the first floor. As I stepped in, a bargirl came out to smoke a cigarette. She looked quite appalled, and judging from the other masseurs’ pictures advertised next to the main door, did not seem the only one. I peeked inside: a dark room was laid out with tables and a bar looking straight outta the seventies, attended by few men, and a couple trotting ladies. No fun, like the stare in the eyes of the smoking girl, standing there, looking at us and in the distance, enjoying her break. Time to have ours, as well… and back to the guesthouse to enjoy some Singha beers.

La Travel for Aid ha presentato la relazione dei 300 giorni di viaggio del progetto sportivo-umanitario “Dal Vietnam all’Italia in bicicletta per i  diversabili”, che sta portando Matteo Tricarico a percorrere in bicicletta in solitaria la distanza di 30.000 chilometri dal Vietnam all’Italia. La finalità umanitaria dell’iniziativa consta nel sensibilizzare ed informare l’opinione pubblica sulle condizioni dell’infanzia disabile, andando ad incontrare i bambini in istituti per diversabili nei paesi attraversati.

In questi primi dieci mesi di viaggio sono stati percorsi oltre 10.000 chilometri, da Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam, proseguendo per la capitale cambogiana, Phnom Penh (ottobre 2009) e poi per quella thailandese, Bangkok (ottobre 2009). Di seguito, l’itinerario si è snodato nuovamente attraverso la Cambogia (novembre 2009) e a nord sino alla capitale del Laos, Vientiane (dicembre 2009) ed è continuato per il nord della Thailandia (gennaio 2010). Sono seguiti il Myanmar (febbraio 2010) e tre mesi in India (febbraio-aprile 2010) per raggiungere l’estremo sud del Subcontinente e ritornare a Calcutta, prima di entrare in Bangladesh dalla frontiera est. Due mesi (maggio-giugno 2010) in Bangladesh e indi il viaggio è proseguito verso nord al confine sud-est del Nepal e successivamente per la sua capitale Kathmandu, per un soggiorno di altri due mesi (luglio-agosto 2010).

La finalità umanitaria del progetto, portare all’attenzione del pubblico la condizione dei disabili, è stata raggiunta in partenariato con otto organizzazioni non governative che hanno aderito al progetto aprendo le loro scuole ed istituti per diversabili alle visite di Matteo. Un migliaio di messaggi e commenti di sostegno hanno seguito la pubblicazione dei video, fotografie e descrizioni scritte delle scuole diffuse attraverso i canali mediatici della Travel for Aid, segno che il messaggio ha raggiunto una parte sensibile del pubblico che segue questa iniziativa.

Oltre alle visite delle strutture per diversabili, Matteo per 20 giorni ha prestato servizio di volontariato come insegnante di lingua inglese e computer nel centro di accoglienza per bambine dell’etnia Munda sfuggite a matrimoni precoci e gestito dai padri missionari Saveriani a Bongshipur, nel sud del Bangladesh. E ancora, in Nepal si appresta a cominciare tre settimane di insegnamento nel villaggio di Charikot ai piedi del monte Everest.

Ecco alcune domande a Matteo, che ci dice qualcosa di piu’ sulle sue meravigliose esperienze:

Qual’è il tuo bilancio di questi primi dieci mesi di viaggio?

“Sono lieto che l’aspetto umanitario del progetto si sia fortemente accresciuto con la partecipazione di nuove organizzazioni umanitarie e di centri da visitare, ben altre quelle che erano le mie aspettative. Come sono commosso dall’entusiasmo dei messaggi di supporto inviatimi da tante persone che virtualmente mi seguono in quest’avventura, che si sta dimostrando una colta maestra di vita. Fortunatamente, non ho avuto nessun incidente di percorso ed oramai sono abbastanza allenato da poter scalare il tetto del mondo.”

Il viaggio si è notevolmente allungato rispetto al programma originario, come mai?

“Dopo dopo aver vissuto per 300 giorni così ramingo, trovo persino difficile continuare a chiamarlo “viaggio”! In realtà, si è trasformata in un’esperienza di esistenza nomade, quasi un vero e proprio modo di vivere e non più semplicemente andare da un punto A ad un punto B, come lo concepii un anno or sono. Di fatto, ho raddoppiato il tempo di permanenza in India ed in Bangladesh, oltre ad aggiungere due mesi di Nepal che non erano affatto previsti. Sino ad ora, ho percorso solo un terzo della distanza che mi separa dalla meta, ma in realtà sono al giro di boa, questa seconda parte del viaggio sarà molto più rapida anche perché le soste saranno più brevi.”

Quali sono stati i momenti più significativi.

“Credo che i due mesi trascorsi in Bangladesh siano stati i più ricchi umanamente perché ho vissuto per alcune settimane ospite in piccole comunità con i padri Saveriani, a contatto diretto con la gente del posto da cui ho appreso tanto e che mi hanno trasmesso la loro semplicità di vita. Ho un vivido ricordo degli occhi curiosi e vogliosi di apprendere delle ragazzine dell’etnia Munda, salvate da matrimoni precoci che al centro potevano studiare e sperare in un’esistenza migliore di quella dei loro genitori. Quest’aspetto umanitario del progetto ha assunto un’importanza personale molto superiore rispetto al viaggio di scoperta e visita delle attrazioni locali. Mi sta portando un arricchimento spirituale interiore ed un nuovo, più profondo senso della compassione.”

A few hundreds of kilometers north of here, in Yala province, Thailand, we got the final proof that Thais totally smoked their brains out: a macaque or better a monkey has been recruited as a cop. A COP.

This story came to my attention by way of my best friend Carlo just around time of the results of the latest Italian political elections. I can see the monkey cop episode epitomizes perfectly what is happening back home. For as much as I dislike calling it this way, but home still is… but let’s go back to the monkey cop.

The Thais, this beautiful people, thought that a monkey cop would reinforce and establish the public image of the armed forces. I think this is really proper and apt: finally, an ape has been put into the right place. For a moment, looking at the avant-garde position of the separatist Muslim southern Thailand province of Yala, the police shows its real face. Some scientist once asserted that some thousands monkeys enclosed all together in a room in front of typewriters may be able to come up with a perfect copy of Dante’s “Divina Commedia”; so far, we just have a monkey cop in Yala province. I hope more will be coming, all over the world.

And coming back “home”: in light of the recent election results, I started imagining what would happen if some wiser human being decided to change the Italian political scene with a bunch of monkeys. I thought better. And better. I really tried to make an effort to remember where I lost track of the episodes, probably in between some hookers fucked in Putin’s bed and a fistful of broken teeth falling out of a big loudmouth. Of course. THEY ALREADY DID IT. Yala province comes second: we (or better, YOU) have thought about it first.

The problem is, and those cute little quirky animals I love so much should forgive me, somebody substituted a big part of the Italian population with so many stupid monkeys too! It’s just ridiculous. It’s almost worst than the Malaysian society. Again, the political results show that the monkeys have taken over my ex country. And there are monkeys everywhere… monkeys that think they are intelligent! Oh my gosh, so many of them! They also read newspapers…and some of them also write them! Wow. Such an amazing result: once again, Italy has appeared to the world as the biggest floating piece of shit in the Mediterranean toilet. Somebody will flush it, very soon. Therefore, be very careful.

The funny thing is that some wiser monkeys, the ones that maybe one day will evolve into humans, decided to ignore the political monkeys’ games, and stayed on their trees eating bananas and fucking their mates instead of going under the big black monolith to press the button and make a choice. Maybe a victory, maybe not, I still feel very sad for the destiny of all of these primates.

I’ve also been told by some other monkeys that “the election day is the only one we have to contribute and show our choice”. Uh. I never thought about this, you wiser, cute, grey colored lemur. You see, somewhere across the big plains of this mud ball we scratch our monkey’s butts on, some monkeys, and I say, JUST SOME are not happy to feed on the plantation’s bananas and press the button once in a while. Some of them, like the black bearded flying macaques, retired on the highest canopies and don’t need to push any button, on any given day. When they look up, they just see the sky, the big, blue, cloudy and shiny sky. They don’t see the banana plantation owner nightstick, and they don’t even know what that button is.

So in a nutshell, or more aptly, in a banana skin, watch your monkey asses: if a monkey can be a cop in Thailand, and a population can be substituted by primates in Italy, a somewhat developed nation, this must mean something, right?

It is just too difficult to stop looking at the tip of your nose, and focus forward, where the truth should be.

It’s good sometimes to discover that somewhere people are still doing good horror movies. And it’s not America!! This time is Thailand.
In a time when the Star Striped movie industry is dying on its last legs and “borrowing” (to say the least offensive) here and there, especially from the Asian markets, it’s quite inspiring to find that the source of if not original, at least brilliant thrills, is now centered in the East.Phobia 2 (5 Praeng) is the follow up to 4Bia and, like a fall 00′s  Creepshow, is composed by 5 different episodes shot by different directors. Wisoot Poonworraluck, Songyos Sugmakanan, Paween Purijitpanya, Banjong Pisanthanakun, Parkpoom Wongpoom are the cream of the crop of Thai horror, and have already shot very good and scary movies like Shutter, Alone, Dorm and the first experiment of this serie, 4Bia.

We found this movie by chance at the local DVD store. Kit Yeng is often looking for cheap video thrills, so she pointed me the cover of this one, and honestly looking at it I didn’t give it a chance, but we got it anyways. Once at home, and realized that this was a movie made up of several episodes (an idea that, don’t know why, always excited me, being a fan of short stories), I looked up for the trailer online and I decided this movie needed an immediate try. Oh boy, I was so wrong at the dvd store!!

The first story I watched, as obvious, was Backpackers: total retarded horror movie genius. This could be a short story by Joe R. Lansdale or David Schow put into frames, with all the blood, guts and horror you can ask, and even more. God, if just this thing happened more to the real English backpackers polluting the Kingdom, I’d be the happiest man in the world.

But that was actually the third episode, so we got back o the first one, called Novice. Without spoiling the great plot, let’s just say that when a mother drops his kid at a far-flung monastery, she’s trying to do it for his own good. This story is definitely scary, and very much kudos to it because it’s the first horror story I see exploring the world on Buddhist monks and monasteries. Ace.

Second comes Ward, which is probably the weakest of the 5 episodes, but still a pretty entertaining one. Beware who you sleep with, it’s always best to sleep alone.

After Backpackers, my favorite (yeah, I love zombies man!) comes Salvage. The story’s about a woman who’s making shady business with her car dealership, re selling vehicles that have been previously torn in deadly accidents. Useless to say she’ll have to put up with more than just a pissed off client, being the ones from beyond even more pissed. Good, solid and with great special effects, among which the best is definitely the boy wrapped around a car tyre… scary!

The last of the bunch is In the End, showing the making of an Asian ghost movie that ends up terribly wrong. This last one is very funny, and ease the tension out with some good chills and laughs.

Overall, when the quality of the stories is so high, Phobia 2 definitely becomes a movie to look after and devour literally. Before it devours you. This is the time for Asian film makers to dig up the vaults of horror and make something good about it, before the sick twist disappears once again. It’s just so awe-inspiring to know that most of hese movies are available here, for so cheap, and will get my addiction fixed. Long life to blood, guts and gore!!! And kudos to Thailand… but kill off more of those backpackers, please!!!

Check out the trailer here:

It’s 1 am and as always happens when I have to spend a night in any airport in the world, I wish I was somewhere else.

I wish we were in Yangon already, trying to wrap our heads around the enigma that so far Myanmar has been to me, seriously wishing I won’t have to come back home for the umpteenth time with a sour smile on my face, for whatever reasons.

I decided not to expect too much, but being here at night sleepless and unable to do that even if I wanted just because I decided to be the best man I can for this girl, it’s hard not to at least WISH it will be great.Bangkok is Bangkok, as always. This time I came in flying, and I was surprised to see a thick cloud of fog surrounding it, I never noticed that before, every time I was there. This said, Bangkok is a big city and I found myself to be more of a kampung monkey, and besides this, Khao San is always Khao San. Steamy, hot, funny for an evening, boring the next day, cheap and appropriate as a shelter to this hectic mega city that has lost itself, completely. I don’t hate this place, at all,  it just  gets harder and harder to understand each coming time. We bought some fake student cards in Khao San, and this time a few people thinking Kit Yeng was my Thai prostitute, started addressing to her in Thai, and she’s always too polite to refuse a smile. I felt weird. It was particularly amazing when, although walking and holding her hand, a tuk tuk driver asked me if I wanted a prostitute, and a ping pong show. Classic, amazing, brilliant. I decided I want to go back to Bangkok with a set of ping pong balls and rackets, and when the first Thai asks me for a ping pong show, get the things out and start playing with her in the middle of the street. Then, ask the bastard for money. I swear, I want to do this.

While sitting in a café sipping a shake, one guy came up asking me to buy a suit, same story. Turns out he’s Nepalese, and we start talking about his country, until his friend comes up and we figure out he’s from Myanmar. A lot of Burmese people live in Bangkok and all over Thailand. Once I gave guitar lessons to one in Koh Tao, and I thought he was Thai almost until the end of our conversation. Amazing, exquisite people, friendly and well spoken, although with a shade of disgrace in their eyes.

I’ve read a lot about Burma, whether to go or not to go, who to support, who to listen to, and I decided yes, I want to go, because my presence can’t make a lot of harm, overall. If these people need someone to talk to, here I am, if they instead just need someone to get some cash from, I’ll do it as long as it’s convenient for me. I’ve just heard good things about this beautiful people, and it’s time to go and test, witness and experience firsthand.

I’ll try to tell it as I see it, nothing more, nothing less. Now, time to close this screen and try to rest bending over the backpacks… yeah we travel in style, Suvarnabhumi airport bench and white and blue lights, caught the 9 pm bus from Khao San because we better stay here and rot for 9 hours than keep on enjoying the theme park for backpackers and sexpatriates downtown. I’m definitely getting older, and wiser, thank god.